I've Been Away

 I am going to introduce myself again. I haven't been blogging in a while.
 I'm Christy Schrage. I am a married mom of 3. I love Jesus! I love to write, paint and help others. I feel we should give of ourselves to people in need, I will try to do this with my writing. It is my goal to remain real and transparent with others without running my mouth constantly.
About my sweet family...
I am married to Kyle. He is a great husband and father. We have had our ups and downs in marriage but right now, through much healing, we are in a really good place.
 Ellie is my oldest child, she is 16. She is beautiful inside and out. She loves to sing and play softball.
 Emma is our middle child, she is 12. She is a sweetheart and loves her soccer.
 Cara is our youngest, she is 10. She is joy. She loves everything.
 I am blessed. I am honored to write for friends. Thanks for reading.

Swirl

Walking with a ribbon of red flowing behind,
dancing in the wind.
There are blue sky's above,
you can see the way.
Continue to swirl, with bows on your shoes.
Live like there's no tomorrow!

Storms

Just like the clouds roll by

so does life

some clouds cause storms

that we want to pass

some clouds produce

a much needed watering

this is how life is

we need to go through the storms

to know how to live in the light

to know how to drink in the refresher rain

feel the feeling

in order

to move forward

Writing and Feeling :)

Sometimes writing is my way to sort out feelings

Ive never been great at speaking how I feel at

the exact moment I feel it

writing helps that

writing is a gentle reminder that I can

be totally real and say exactly what I feel

it is very freeing for me

i thank everyone for taking the time

to read what I write

even if sometimes

it makes no sense

I hope everyone understands that

we all have faults but we can all

strive to be better and to make the

journey a more truthful experience

and feel it

it is okay!!

I feel GREAT things coming!!

Why I Blog

I blog because for years I was numb. I tried unsuccessfully to be like everyone else. I tried to be the perfect parent and failed miserably.

I am not like everyone else. I see now though, that no one is like everyone else. We all have gifts and talents to share! There is no cookie cutter person. We are all made as unique individuals by a loving God who made us to use our gifts to help others. This is what I want to share and encourage other people to trust their gift. Self doubt haunted me for years and it keeps people from "letting go" . Once we let go of it, we can encourage others and accomplish much.

Understanding

To be understood used to be so importand to me

now, being the one who understands

is more important...

to be able to reach

out and understand

is a gift

The Layer

is there a way to understand

and not have an

underlying layer of sadness

so far

I try and try

to avoid thinking

about the layer of

sadness that is with

me

It is much easier to see

others and want to

help them

because I really

don't want anyone

to feel like I have felt

and sometimes feel

what I feel leads

to understanding

but I don't know

WHY

The Organization of Writing Thoughts

Writing is like a prescription

I sit down

write what goes

through my mind

go back and read it

then I am completely surprised

that it makes sense

then I am even more

surprised

that anyone can

relate to it

but there is always

someone who

understands

this lets me know

there are others

out there like me

who write for

understanding

I pull what I write

from my heart

most of the time

buried so deep

I can't give it much

th0ught or it will

retreat again

Layering

Things can have several layers

do we ever really get to the middle

all we can do is

try to find it

the journey is the

destination in a way

TRY TRY TRY

okay, so now that I am posting this it is reminding me of the old tootsie pop commercial. How many licks to the center...LOL

The Box

sometimes no matter how hard you try

nothing happens

nothing can change and you

feel like you are stuck in a box

the box will move sometimes so

you think there is a way out

but there isn't

still there in the box

the way out is an

illusion

How does anyone

change this?

the Silence

Sometimes the silence makes me sad
I don’t know why
More fun to be had?
That’s not it
not fun for me
I am still searching
how to be
to be true
without any
falseness

Without Words

Sometimes there are things

that words can't describe

feelings that can't be

put into writing

they are there but

I can't really find

any words so

I stay quiet but

feel the need to write

anyway

to try to make sense

of things in my head

that do not make

any sense

Hidden Sun

Sunlight is proof
there is light
behind every cloud
even if we can't
see past the cloud
it will eventually move
and
there will be light
again

My writing

I love to write and I love to help people. I sometimes write from what may seem like a place of confusion. Writing helps me sort out my thoughts. I don't always like the things I write, paint or say. I get very irritated with myself sometimes.

We all just have to keep learning. Living life gives us all the great opportunity to start every day anew. :)

Okay....on a lighter note....the other night I asked Kyle if he wanted Taste of China for dinner and Emma looked up and said "what did you say about a vagina"? I think I am wayyyyy to southern!

Enjoying your gifts!!

As women

we tend to compare ourselves

with others

sometimes dwelling on

our shortcomings instead

of our very

unique personal gifts

if we were all alike

life would be boring

we are all a different array

of colors and styles

made to work together

for good

to form a

beautiful rainbow

EMBRACE individuality-

You are made to be you!

Thinking vs Feeling

Sometimes it is not easy

learning to think a new way

because the feeling might

come before the thinking

then you have to really

think about why you

ever thought the other

way in the first place...

Confusing, isn't it???

Sometimes I Wonder

Sometimes I wonder

if I write too much

give away too much

emotion

it is easier for me to write

than to speak about

feelings in person (my close friends know this)

but it is never too much

if it helps one person

if it makes someone

feel less alone

because that is what I am

meant to do

I've been so blessed

by little angel friends

who encourage

I hope to pass along the blessings

with writing, painting and friendship

I am so excited to see what

the new year will bring!!!

For Debby who never gives up on anyone!!!

Feelers

There are so many things

that happen

I can feel but

not really grasp

to stay peaceful

I have to accept the unexplained

this was hard at first

but I can breathe

through it and learn to

live in wonder

to be thankful

for the unexpected

to find joy in the

gifts of color and empathy

The Path

God Knows all

he planted the path

for us

in our hearts

sometimes we

have trouble seeing

it

we have so much

to do

so much to see

it is important not

to miss

the clues

the stepping stones

leading to the path

they are there

to lead us to

the places where

our gifts are

most needed

Finding Blue

When I looked at the sky today in the car line, God seemed to be saying "when you think you are living in gray, look closely, you will find the blue".......