Blocking the Light

Distraction can make us

blind to the light
all the while the light shines brightly
why do we let things block the light
when the light is all we need

The Bible

I am so excited about the mini series, "the Bible", tonight on the History channel. It is produced by Mark Burnett, who produces Survivor and many other things on TV. He wanted to make a movie showing how much God has loved us from the start.
 Love your God with all of your heart and love your neighbor as yourself. It is really simple. It is positive and it doesn't say "judge your neighbor".

Love God, Love people. :)

life

Walk through the gray to get to the light
 smile until it's real
Be thankful in the stressful times

 God will help you heal

A Dream Follower

What is your dream?
We all have one hidden in our hearts.
 Maybe it is a bit dusty, but we can dust if off!
 No one is ever too old
 to follow a dream!

Brain Freedom

Life is such a learning experience. I'm so glad God is so gentle in teaching me.

All of my life I have gone through life like a bull in a china store. I was labeled that way as a kid, adhd, headstrong. My zodiac sign is the ram so I just figured I was destined to be this way. There are several issues with this because when you ram your head into everything head first, sometimes, your head gets stuck in the drywall. For years, I have thought this is just who I am and I am totally NOT able to change it. So, I put up prison walls around myself with this issue. I convinced myself that I am impulsive, headstrong, unorganized, flaky....but the good qualities, artistic, visionary, empathetic, intuitive, funny...were good enough to balance out the other ones.

FINALLY, after years of thinking this way, I am free of the label. There is no reason why I have to live with bars....I can learn to stop and think, I can learn to not go headfirst into a wall without thinking, I can learn to keep my mouth shut until I have thought about my answer. I CAN do these things. There is no bar that says "christy has to be impulsive and unorganized".

There is are no more prison bars around my brain. I am FREE. Thank you God!

Peace Chasing

If you are feeling overwhelmed plan to take one babystep a day
God will help you
we are all here for a reason
and
everyone has a gift!

The road we are on is long. Layers of the onion for all to peel. I am so thankful to God and all of my friends and family who have been on this road with me. Being in school again and learning all about counseling has been a big part of healing for me. I'm not perfect, just different. It is so meaningful to me to be able to hold my hands out and say "how can I help you" to hurting people, instead of  "let me fix you" as I did in the past. Helping others without fixing is done in love. It took me almost half of a lifetime to learn this. Fixing always led to thinking I have to control, control is not done with love (although, I never realized this in the past). Love is hands open, control is hands closed.

 Thanks to everyone who has helped me on this journey, ya'll know who you are and I love you.  

as I sit down to write

In a field of bright yellow flowers
I sit down to write
 why has it taken you so long? he ask
I don't answer
then, I say, sometimes I get off track and lose my way
I struggle to see you but I can't see the white through all the clouds
 things get in my way, feelings of the past abandonment
He says "the white is nearer than anyone knows"
 The white starts shining brighter as it hugs me.
God then says, "I will never abandon you"
 Then the white turns to a bright royal blue and fills my heart
I'm shaky but feeling loved, not quite strong but on my way...
 never to be lonely again

My Health

Hi,
 I'm sitting here tonight alone. I was excited about being alone and painting but I cleaned the house instead, lol.
 I'm not feeling great and decided to tell my blog readers about it.

 On Tuesday I went to my gynecologist for an ultra sound because I have had some pain in my side and some other symptoms and they wanted to check it out. I wasn't really expecting them to find anything.  They did find I have a cyst on my right ovary but they found something I wasn't expecting. They told me I had a mass in my uterus and they needed to do a biopsy right then. At the time, I was feeling okay about it but really not wanting to have the biopsy done. Biopsies of the uterus are very painful because they  have to pin the cervix out of the way to get to the uterus. I survived though and they told me I was brave for not screaming, ha.
 I now have to wait a week. A long week. I have gone through being certain it is a cyst to being sad and numb tonight. I want to be healthy for my family!! I want to scream that but God only needs a whisper.
 If you are a praying person, please say a prayer for me. I know God is in control of my life, but I will take each and every prayer!
 

As we walk along, things happen
not always what we have planned
but
through the disappointment
the real plan will emerge
in all its brilliant color
when you are disappointed,
look for the rainbow and
the path will be just around the corner

Thanks God for always pointing out the paths of our hearts!

God's Lessons Through Nature

I sit and look at the Bradford Pear trees in the car line. I don't particularly like them, I am allergic to the blooms. I do look at them as a lesson. The one tree, that is usually closest to my car, looks like a lot of people going different ways, yet all together they hold the tree up. Can you see it in the picture? It is yet another reminder for me for everyone to use their gifts to help something to grow.

Kinda like the Refuge!

The Path

I know I write about this a lot...
God will let us know when we are on the path
the one we were born to travel
it is like stepping onto a large peaceful platform
when we get there
we will know

Changes in the Fall

Fall reminds me that no matter what changes God is making in us...we are all still beautiful in his eyes...just like the fall leaves are beautiful in our eyes.

Your Path

IF you are feeling stuck, try to take a step back, pray and listen. Sometimes, the things we think can't be fixed, can be fixed! Sometimes, we put roadblocks in our own paths to avoid the fear of finding our dream and having to follow it. We are never too old or busy to learn something new.

Please think about it and answer. Here is my question...What is the one thing you wish you would have pursued but didn't and why? I would like feedback.

Thanks! I'll share mine with you soon.

Just Believe

If it is broken, God can fix it. It doesn't mean we have be perfect or judge others...it only means we have to ask him. It is quite simple when we take away the mess we humans have made of everything. He is still there with us and just wants us to BELIEVE!

To Ellie

Coming Out of the Pit

There comes a time when we decide to get out of the pit

a person has to find it for themselves

once we get to that place

God is right there

holding his hands out

he will gently pull us

out of the deep pit

Had a Bad Day?

Ever feel this way? There is life at the end of the tunnel...babysteps, one day at a time, until you get there and find the lesson and learn from it. Thank you God for your teaching!

Reminding Myself

I have to remind myself to breathe in

listen to God

learn from the things I have been through

always listen

listening is the key

to understanding

me

I haven't been writing much during my recovery from surgery. I have 3 and a half weeks to go until I can even lift a milk carton. This is kinda making me a little down because I like to be the mom and be able to help. I will now have so much more empathy for anyone going through a big surgery. I am thankful about how far I have come and still a little anxious about the next three weeks. I am still having pain from the incision which was rather large but I am off of the narcotic pain pills (thank you God). It is hard feeling dependent on others. Very humbling. With all of that said, I'm thanking God everthing went okay. I just hope I don't have to do it again for a looooonnnnnnggggg time!

oh, the picture is me, finally feeling human again.

New Day

It is so funny how life continually gives us new perspectives, new starts.

God teaches us daily and is gracious enough to give us all time to use the changes in our lives.

If you are feeling alone today, please remember tomorrow is a new day. We are not alone, we have God and he gives us angels in our lives daily. Cherish the moments......

Photo by Kim :)